I wonder always what all the self-care hype is all about? Why is self-care important? Find out what self-care really is and discover why making it a priority is important for all moms.
I wonder always what all the self-care hype is all about? Why is self-care important? Find out what self-care really is and discover why making it a priority is important for all moms.
“I really needed this today,” I said to myself as I adjusted the massage settings on my chair and dipped my toes in the bubbling, warm water at my feet. I could feel my worries wash away, even if just for a few moments, as I thought and chatted about anything and everything.
Taking time away to pamper yourself with a pedicure is a beautiful way to step away from your responsibilities for a while and relax.
But taking hours off your day to go to the spa isn’t always realistic as a mom. And the good news is, you don’t have to take a lot of time or spend a lot of money to practice self-care and nourish yourself in meaningful ways.
Even though I enjoyed my afternoon of luxury, it felt fleeting since days like this are few and far between.
I wanted to think that there could be a better way. There is a way to fill my cup so I can approach motherhood calm, confident, and refreshed.
As a mom, you take care of everyone around you. You kiss boo-boos (physical and emotional), you help feed, bathe, and clothe your little ones. You take older kids to school and transport them to birthday parties, sports, and other activities. It can feel exhausting.
Maybe you occasionally feel calm and even playful with your kids and surprisingly find pockets of time to do things you love. But you wish you could more consistently bring more of those moments into your days.
Or maybe it has been months, years even, since you felt beautiful and care-free. You can’t remember the last time you put on a fresh shirt that didn’t get spit-up, baby food, or some other unidentifiable mush on it within 15 minutes.
The key to going from exhausted to refreshed and energized as a mom is prioritizing your self-care. There is a way to step out of this seemingly endless cycle of all that needs to get done and make space for yourself in your life as a mom.
But how?
You are on call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Even on vacation, you are still a mom. And you wouldn’t have it any other way. But in order to be the calm and playful mom you long to be, you need to take care of yourself.
Before a flight, the flight attendant goes over the safety regulations. One of the instructions she gives is that if oxygen masks are needed, you must put your mask on first before assisting anyone else, including your children. This goes against all of our motherly instincts.
Right?. But if you think about it, if you were to help everyone else first, you would run out of life-giving oxygen and not be able to help anyone else, including yourself.
This holds for motherhood as well. When we take care of ourselves first, we are able to approach motherhood from a place of abundance and love rather than living in survival mode, always on the edge of burnout.
Okay, so now that you know just how important self-care is for moms, take a deep breath, and as you breathe out, let all of the guilt that you have been holding onto around self-care drift away.
Taking care of yourself is the greatest gift you can give to your children. It gives them more joyful experiences with a mom who was able to be present and playful. And all because you took the time to nurture and love yourself.
Not only that, it helps set a priceless example for your kids. Taking care of you guides your kids in learning and embodying taking care of and loving themselves as well.
As much as we want to say, “Do as I say, not as I do,” our kids are watching and learning from the examples we set.
By bringing self-care and self-love into your life on a daily and moment-to-moment basis, you are showing your kids how to do this for themselves as well. What could be a greater legacy than that?!
Let’s start by tackling the misconceptions around self-care.
Although self-care can include days at the spa and lunches with girlfriends, that is not the true essence of self-care.
Okay, so what exactly is self-care then?
True self-care is taking care of the whole you. body. mind. and soul.
Self-care is something you can bring into every moment of every day.
The simple act of mindfully pausing to ask yourself what you need in any given moment is an act of self-care.
Often, the seemingly insignificant act of asking what you need can feel dignifying and help you to feel loved and cherished.
When you pause to notice what you need, take time to give those things to yourself.
Many times, what you need is something that can be done right then and there.
For example, maybe you have been rushing around all day, and you just need to pause (close your eyes, if that feels good to you) and take some slow, deep breaths. Or maybe you need to rehydrate with a cool glass of water.
Or you are really hydrated, and you just haven’t stopped chasing the kids long enough to use the restroom.
All of these things can be done right in the moment you notice you need them.
When you notice you need something that can’t be taken care of right in the moment. Make a tentative plan. You don’t need to work out all of the details right then and there, but take the first step.
So if you have been up three nights in a row with sick kids, and you are barely functioning due to sheer exhaustion. Pick up the phone and call your spouse, your mom, or your babysitter and see when they can help out, so that you can take a nap and recharge.
I hope that you are starting to see that you don’t always need a lot of extra time for self-care. It is lovely when you can block out time for yourself care, but depending on the season of life that you are in, how old your children are, and what your other obligations are, taking big blocks of time is not always possible.
Here are some more ways you can make time for self-care as a busy mom.
You intended to just jump on social media to respond to your best friend’s most recent post about her newborn baby, but forty-five minutes later, you are lost in your feed and have forgotten why you logged in in the first place.
Noticing where you are spending your time is a great way to start shifting your habits to create more time for things that will truly bring you joy.
Have you ever heard the saying, “It takes a village?” Well, it is true. Moms are superheroes, but that doesn’t mean we have to do everything alone.
Asking for and accepting help from others can go a long way in helping us to make space for self-care in our lives.
Self-care can be woven throughout your day. It can be a part of everything you do. Yes, even washing the dishes.
You can bring self-care into every aspect of your day by bringing your senses into play.
For example, when you are washing the dishes, feel the warmth of the water and the light, airy bubbles as you plunge your hands into the sink.
When you go for a walk, notice the sights and smells around you. Is there a breeze? Can you hear any birds or crickets chirping? What does the ground feel like under your feet?
No matter what you are doing, you can always bring your awareness back to your breath.
Bringing your focus back to your breath several times throughout the day is a wonderful way to help settle any anxious thoughts and bring you back to equilibrium.
Taking time to meditate is a great way to practice settling your thoughts, getting in tune with your emotions, and staying calm when things feel chaotic.
Choose a guided meditation to listen to at least once a day to help you deepen your self-care practice. Here is a free library of guided meditations for you to choose from.
Let’s dive a little deeper into the different 4 types of self-care. When you take care of all four aspects of your being, you will feel truly nourished and find more balance in your life as well.
Emotional self-care can often be overlooked, but it is key to finding your calm as a mom. Our feelings and emotions have messages for us. Taking time to allow yourself to tune into your emotions and listen to the messages they have for you will allow you to address your needs and allow the emotion to be released, so you can live more fully.
Whatever your spiritual beliefs are, taking time daily to acknowledge the source of life and the connectedness of all beings is a great way to bring more awe and wonder into your daily life.
Many of the activities you practice as a part of your self-care can encompass multiple types of self-care. You can even find ways to incorporate a spiritual and emotional aspect to self-care activities that you love so that you aren’t necessarily adding more things you need to do to your to-do list. For example:
Wondering what to do now that you have cleared time in your schedule to prioritize your self-care?
Here are some self-care activities to help nourish your soul as a busy mom. And you can download a free list of self-care practices to reference any time you need some self-care inspiration.
It can be helpful to have a special space in your home with things that bring you joy and enhance your self-care.
Creating this special self-care space can make it easier for you to incorporate time for self-care in your day.
For most moms, the mornings and evenings can often be the most stressful times of day. Having a plan and practicing self-care at those times of day can often help you navigate those busy times with more calm and ease.
Creating a self-care morning routine or following a simple self-care ritual on the busier mornings is a great way to kickstart a calm day.
If evenings are when you feel the most frustrated, make sure to set yourself up for success with a self-care evening routine. This will help you keep your cool while making dinner and helping kids with their homework, with a baby on your hip.
Using Essential Oils as a way to enhance and support your self-care practice and bring more elements of calm and joy to your motherhood journey.
Intentionally choosing essential oils for self-care can help you feel peaceful or energized, can immediately shift your mood, and help you to stay calmer with your kids.
Just as you take care of your kids every day. Mothering and caring for yourself will become a normal and special part of your life.
Take time to notice what you need moment-to-moment and do your best to lovingly care for yourself every day.
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